What is Toxic Positivity? Signs, Effects and How to avoid it?

It is an assumption that doesn’t matter what bad situation occurs in life one must always stay positive. But when such positivity interferes with one’s personal growth then it becomes toxic and turns into what we call, Toxic Positivity.

It’s always said to be positive and think positive and it’s great to have a pessimistic attitude but sometimes it’s necessary to experience and deal with negative emotions as well. In Toxic Positivity, a person doesn’t acknowledge his/her true feelings and avoid them in case they are negative in nature. But experiencing one’s true emotions and allowing them to come into consciousness is a therapeutic process and a good thing for one’s mental health as compared to keep hanging on positive thoughts which can be imaginative and fake.

Toxic Positivity occurs due to lack of self-awareness as people dismiss their true intentions and feelings and always look at the bright side. They do this because it is difficult for them to deal with negative emotions as they are not comfortable and easy to manage at all.

Signs that you have Toxic Positivity

• You hide your real emotions.
• You totally ignore or avoid things that are not positive.
• You always think “positive” doesn’t matter what kind of situation it is.
• You can’t say no to people.
• You feel bad when you experience negative emotions.
• You always put your attention on positive aspects of a bad situation.
• You shame others for showing their negative emotions.
• You always present the best version of yourself even if it is fake.
• You avoid problems instead of facing them.

Effects of Toxic Positivity

Toxic Positivity doesn’t allow one to experience the real emotions and live in an imaginative world which is full of positivity. This can lead the person to drift apart from reality. Such people don’t show affection and care for themselves. Inhibiting true emotions can lead to anxiety, detachment issues, low self-esteem, high stress level, sleep issues and physical health issues. It invalidates the real experience and can lead to unhealthy coping mechanisms. It also prevents growth as people avoid everything that is painful as facing challenging situations makes a person grow in life.

How to deal with Toxic Positivity

1. Learn to accept true emotions

Accepting true emotions means allowing yourself to feel whatever it is without judging, avoiding and neglecting them. Being aware of emotions and accepting them as real is beneficial for one’s emotional and mental health. People who have toxic positivity push down their negative emotions but rejecting your emotions can actually make thing worse so it will be great to accept them as they really are even if they are painful.

2. Manage your negative emotions

After accepting the true emotions, negative emotions can make a person uncomfortable. And toxic positive people avoid negative emotions because they are unable to even manage those negative emotions. So, one should learn to manage negative emotions which could be done by:

• Exercising
• Journaling
• Letting go of the past
• Relaxation techniques
• Problem solving strategies

3. Develop empathy

Instead of letting the other person feel low and ignored for their negative emotions, try to think about the situation from their perspective. Try to understand what they might be experiencing and feeling in that bad situation. It will teach emotional regulation so that one can manage their emotions as well as of others. Having helpful behavior for others is really good to develop empathy within ourselves.

4. Learn problem-solving

It’s great to have a positive outlook in life but sometimes it gets necessary to accept the worse situation as it is and then solve problems in life. In toxic positivity, people generally avoid and downplay their negative emotions and just look at the positive picture. But it is important to solve that problem and completely remove it from life. So people must get to the root of the problem and solve it without using any avoidance technique and unhealthy coping mechanism.

5. Put your emotions into words

People with toxic positivity usually feel difficulty in accepting their true emotions. So they are recommended journaling in which they can put everything that they feel into words. As whatever we write, it gets imprinted on our minds and it gets easy to accept everything fully. They can write their experiences, feelings, thoughts, beliefs and everything in that journal which is considered to be a therapeutic process as well. Thus, it will even help one to track the emotions and thoughts regularly and apply required changes into the life

6. Replace toxic statements with non-toxic statements

People who have toxic positivity usually engage in toxic statements which can seem positive but are bad for one’s mental health, personal growth and good social life. Like toxic positive people might say, “Someone always has more worse than you do.” Instead they should say that “I can understand why you are so upset.”

• Toxic statement 1: Everything happens for a reason.
• Non-toxic statement 1: It’s okay to feel bad sometimes.
• Toxic statement 2: Failure is unacceptable.
• Non-toxic statement 2: Failures leads to personal growth.
• Toxic statement 3: It could have been worse.
• Non-toxic statement 3: Sometimes, we feel bad things now what can I do?
• Toxic statement 4: Remove negativity!
• Non-toxic statement 4: Suffering is a part of life

Visit OnlineCounselling4u for Mental Health Counselling

OnlineCounselling4U is the best platform for seeking mental health counseling from trained and knowledgeable psychologists/Counsellors. They have wide experience in dealing with clients who face problems in communication, speaking, socializing, working on themselves and many others. So, if you think you have toxic positivity or show signs mentioned above in the blog then don’t hesitate to book your session on OnlineCounselling4U. You can seek online counseling services in various modes, language, time slot and can even choose psychologist as per your needs and demands.

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